A Fear of Falling

I have fallen down the stairs twice since last September. The first time I fell down an entire flight of stairs. I had a severe concussion and deep bruising of my lower back muscles that is still bothering me to this day.

A little over a week ago I fell down the stairs again. This time I was going to answer my door and I slid down 4 steps on my left arm. Thankfully, I didn’t hit my head or back this time. I do have a rather ugly bruise on my arm.

I have had a fear of falling for many years.  I have no problem with heights. I will go to the top of the tallest building in the world as long as there is no chance of me falling off the building. I do not want to jump out of an airplane or bungee jump. The falling would give me a heart attack. 

It is not just long falls that bother me. I freak out when I step down off of a curb and the curb is higher than I thought it was. In that few seconds of my foot not hitting the ground I nearly panic.

So what is it about falling that scares me so much? It is the loss of control. When you are falling you rarely have the ability to change direction, to affect your speed or to determine how and where you are going to land. That is what freaks me out about falling. I have no control over the outcome. I am a slave to gravity and all it cares about is bringing me down! 

A medicine I am on has falling as a side effect. When I was on a higher dosage I could be walking across a room and just fall down for no reason. I am on a very small dosage right now but as you can see falling is still an issue for me. I have to hold onto the banister or lean on the wall when I am walking up and down stairs. Sometimes I forget and that is when I take a tumble. So for my own safety I have to hold onto something every time I am on any stairs. Not doing so is hazardous to my health. 

If stairs are an issue for you please be safe and be mindful of what you are doing every time you are on the stairs.

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