Welcome to Relationship Tuesdays.
This is my space to delve into relationship issues we all deal with but a lot of us just can’t seem to figure out how to get past. I will pick a topic and give you some good information about it. Comments from the peanut gallery are always welcome.
Last week I tried to lighten the mood because we were dealing with some deep stuff the week before. Well, this week we are jumping right back into the deep end. If baggage is what crowds your heart so there is no room for anyone else to get in, an unexamined past is what strangles a relationship to death.
The problem with the past is it doesn’t go away. You move on but your past lingers around like the old guy in the club who knows if he just hangs around until the end of the night he will be able to talk some woman (who has had too much to drink) into going home with him. Your past does not just stick around it plays a big part in your present which determines your future.
When you don’t pay attention to your past you are destined to relive it, over and over and over again! The thing is, you can’t stop something from happening again if you don’t recognize that it happened in the first place. As much as we may want to “leave the past in the past” if you don’t want it to negatively impact your present and future, you need to look at it and see what patterns are there.
What have you done the same and how did that work out for you? What bad habits have you brought into every relationship? What type of person do you normally date? Do you have a “type”? If you do have a type how have your relationships with that kind of person turned out?
Everything from the past is not bad. You will find that you have good habits along with the bad. You will also recognize the strengths you bring to a relationship. The most important thing is to take the time to think about your past and how it has influenced you. I promise you that this is not a pointless activity. If you give it an honest effort it will be very helpful.
On Thursday, I will explain how I kept going back to my past choices expecting a different outcome. It was the true definition of insanity! Hope to see you there!